In 2013 Will You Be A Victim or Victor?

Today we are just a day away from the new year. 2012 did not bring 'the apocalypse'. It did however bring about a united nation with the amazing Olympic games, a joyous and spectacular event I am sure most of you will agree. It has been a positively packed year, with some great highlights I appeared in Eastenders several times. Yep little old me on the BBC. I had breakfast with Ian King Editor of The Business Times with a host of others invited to join him at News International HQ.

Life Is a Rollercoaster

I met some wonderful people this year who have positively changed my life forever. Brad Burton, Sanjay Shah, Daniel Wagner, Nigel Baker, Mark Northall to name but a few. Its been a tough year personally having to move out of my comfort zone and work harder than ever before networking and marketing my brand. This year saw my hubby and I celebrate 25 years of roller-coaster living. well that's what marriage is, isn't it? Up and down round and round til you feel a little sick, then madly you want to do it all over again. It is like the most extreme ride you will ever go on, touching every emotion within you. If you're like me you are determined to keep your nerve and overcome the negative and enjoy the positive experience, exhilaration and deep sense of achievement. No one said life was easy but the results of putting in the effort are worth it.

Dysfunctional Vs Drama

Before I sign off for 2013 let me share with you one last thought provoking moment. Have you ever noticed how some people always seem to be surrounded and involved in huge drama? be it illness, arguments, complaints about others, feeling wronged and having to get others on their side creating discord and disharmony. How it is always the same people making such a big deal?  The funny thing about this is, these same people would laugh at you, be offended and deny it til they are blue in the face, feeling victimised,  if you dare to point this out to them, leading to more drama. This always make me smile thinking about it, although it shouldn't as it has changed my life in ways I would not have wished for but have to accept. For me personally having dealt with life and death decisions frequently in my line of work and having been faced with my own sons suicide attempt, most of what they consider drama to me is merely dysfunctional attention seeking.

Beauty and The Beast

I witnessed a situation today that left me thinking many of us are so unconsciously unaware of how our behaviour is impacting on other peoples lives and what effect it is having on the survival of a family unit. As individuals we seek approval, control and security and in doing so this can leave us wide open to feeling negative emotions such as anger, frustration and fear etc which then leads to a display of behaviour that does not reflect our beauty more the beast. I did not get involved in this situation merely took it as a learning curve, to be very aware of my own behaviour, although inside me a storm was raging, as it had triggered much negative emotion.

Decisions, Decisions

I made a decision that as it was non of my business I would accept the situation and let it go. It took several hours to release the negative emotions it had triggered inside me, but once this shift in mindset had occurred I felt peaceful inside again. I accept I cannot make people change their behaviour I can only support them when they are ready to make the changes themselves. I also have to accept they may never be ready and love them anyway - from a distance.  So with this is mind in 2013 I am not going to focus of what has gone and potentially forever lost. I choose to focus on NOW being fully present in the moment creating positive memories and being consciously aware of how my behaviour may be impacting on others.

Cause & Effect

Some people will always be stuck in 'effect' and act the victim of their circumstances and behaviour as they are unconsciously unaware. Others will become conscious of their behaviour and its cause and move forward, making positive changes, taking on the roll of a victor. In reading this blog post and having possibly provoked some thought within you. Let me ask you are you a victim or a victor? What changes will you be making in 2013?

May your path shine brightly as you pursue your destiny.

Happiest of New years to you all.

Here's to an incredible 2013.

Much Love

Debs x

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